The views and opinions expressed in this post solely belong, to Goodie Proctor
Barbershops are still one of the most hyper-masculine places in America, and as much as professional barbers do not want to admit it is still a place where groups of men sit around and have closed minded, one sided conversations about homosexuality.
Now that is the very short answer to the question that @Justinj1232 posed yesterday via twitter. The long answer is something that I think most gay men do not want to admit, disclose, or and issues that they even want to tackle. I believe the underline reason that gay men don’t like barbershops is because Barbershops tend to house the type of men gay men are attracted too, seek, and ultimately go after.
I have always been somewhat afraid of getting my haircut, but not the actual clippers but the experience and ritual that came with going to get it done. Even as a young gay kid with my mother, father, or uncle sitting in the waiting area I always felt like at any given moment an alarm would sound and the guy cutting my hair would somehow discover that I was low key enjoying his bulge rubbing up against my hand whenever he turned the chair.
It was this fear of somehow being “found out”, that fuelled my fear to going to one of the most beloved staples in the black community. The fear that I would be subsequently harassed or chastised for feelings and hormones I had no control over, and did not really understand, by men I found to be the definition of attractive at that young age. It was like in my mind and with my vivid imagination I always felt like when a group of five or more uber-masculine men got together their masculine energy came together to form into some type of “Supermale”, who’s only power is to sniff out and destroy less macho or gay men….Like a damn gay bashing Captain Planet.
Nowadays my fear when it comes to going to a barbershop does not reside in getting beat up, tied, or bashed but it involves missing an opportunity to engage in a real-life episode of Baitbus “Barbershop addition”. That once vivid imagination that involved me being attacked has not been replaced with a sexual admiration of my would-be attacker. Now before anyone says anything smart let me be THE FIRST to remind everyone that I am of the flesh and that flesh is weak….tender….and is in need of a good beating sometimes 😉
In the gay community, we tend to idolize and put on a pedestal the ideals that to be attractive as a man you must be masculine, fit, and passable to our hetero brothering. Now we can argue that this is basic “trickle down genetics” yielded to us by our forefathers, and gay caveman ancestors who only sought the stronger and more dominate as our leaders and/or lovers. On the other hand, you can argue that it is just simply the media and how to be masculine in America is the cultural norm and has been for a while.
And with the barbershop being a place where masculinity is cultivated, expressed, and glorified it only makes sense that it’s a place where the gay man not only loves to frequent but also fears.
One could also argue that the barbershop will be the last great battle when it comes to the gay man being respected and accepted within the male community, ESPECIALLY in the black community where the barbershop is held as a staple and symbol of black entrepreneurship, community, and vocal candidness.
However, this respect must first come from the respect we give to ourselves.
With that being said I had to do a video response on this topic. Check it out…
What do you think we can do to fight this homophobia in the black community?
‘Ru Paul’s Drag Race’ Star Chi Chi DeVayne Passes Away at 34-Years-Old
Zavion Davenport, better known as RuPaul’s Drag Race’s Chi Chi DeVayne has died at the young age of 34, fellow alum Trinity K. Bonet confirmed on Instagram today.
The Drag Race contestant had been diagnosed with scleroderma, also called crest syndrome, back in 2018.
Fans and other contestants of the show had been sharing the DeVayne’s payment information to assist with the overwhelming cost of hospital bills. Shea Coulee and Priyanka had been especially involved in raising funds for their fellow alum.
‘Real Housewives of Potomac’ star Candiace Dillard Makes Fatphobic Comment Towards Blogger and Suggest That He “Drop Dead”
*deep negro spiritual sigh* There are very few things that truly anger me. Somehow, Candiace, a woman whose mouth seems to get her beat up often, has found one of those few buttons with her latest statement.
So, here I am, minding my fat ass business when I see this:
Rumor has it that she was talking about Kyle from The Black Socialites. It really doesn’t matter who she was talking about, but I guess we’ll never know because she didn’t have the courage to say a name. She did have the courage, however, to talk about her involvement with “plots” against other cast members. She was able to talk for two hours, under the glow of her pale husband’s flickering TV screen, about absolutely nothing of substance.
There are uprisings happening, a pandemic happening, but she’s worried about “plotting” in the DMV. We just passed the 6th anniversary of Michael Brown’s death. That’s in her backyard. That’s a pain that she should be deconstructing. Instead she chooses to attack a fat Black man who is working hard to bring her show press.
I’ll end with the victim’s words, and we can all go back to not knowing Candiace exists:
Trump Administration Cuts Protections for Transgender Americans
On Friday, the Trump administration announced it would be rolling back an Obama-era rule protecting transgender Americans from discrimination in health care.
Under the Obama administration, Section 1557 of the Affordable Care Act expanded the definition of sex discrimination to include discrimination based on one’s gender identity. Under a revised version of the rule, the Department of Health and Human Services will enforce Section 1557 “by returning to the government’s interpretation of sex discrimination according to the plain meaning of the word ‘sex’ as male or female and as determined by biology” beginning in mid-August. In other words, doctors and insurance companies receiving funding from the Fed can legally refuse any patient needing transition-related medical care.
Of course, as quickly as the rule was finalized, many LGBTQ+ organizations including the ACLU,announced intentions to sue the Trump administration over this new language. “The Trump admin has issued a rule that will embolden health care discrimination against transgender people.. All while a global pandemic is occurring.” said the ACLU in a tweet.
Forget a global pandemic, ACLU. Friday’s announcement came on the fourth anniversary of the Pulse nightclub tragedy, a mass shooting at a popular Florida gay nightclub that left 49 people and the shooter dead.
President Trump has made it clear how he feels about the nearly 1.4 million transgender people in this country, his fellow Americans – he doesn’t feel anything.